Cut to one day in the heat of summer in Tucson, AZ, in stop & go traffic on I-10. Engine starts to overheat, and I'm about a mile from the next exit, going about 10 mph at best. I turn on the heater full blast in an effort to siphon some of the heat away from the engine. Steam is pouring from under the hood. Finally the engine dies. I manage to roll out of traffic to the shoulder. When my Dad shows up to tow me home, we find that the engine had gotten so hot that the spark plugs had melted and fused to the engine block! My beloved car was toast. I ended up taking $50 for the salvage yard to take it off my hands. :(
If I had just spent the $10 lousy dollars the first time I realized the radiator cap was failing, I could very well still have that car. Or at least driven it for a few more years and gotten more than $50 when I finally let it go. I say I loved that car. But did I really? I had (still have) affection for it when I take the time to think about that. But honestly, if I really loved the car wouldn't I have replaced the radiator cap? Wouldn't I have taken better care of it, if I really loved it? Love, after all, is proven by action, not words or even emotions. Love is a verb. It's something you do. If you do nothing, you do not love.
What's my point? Waiting until someone brings up divorce before getting marriage counseling is like waiting until your engine has caught on fire before deciding to replace a faulty radiator cap. Barring a miracle, it's too late. Do you love your spouse? Do you value your marriage? Do you love your kids enough that you do not want to fracture the fundamental core of their sense of security and well-being, namely the belief that mommy and daddy love each other and will always be there as an unbreakable unit? If so, pour into it NOW. Take action NOW, demonstrate your love for the one you said you wanted to share your life with -- become One Flesh with -- NOW, before it's melted, seized up, and only good for the junkyard.
Attend a marriage seminar or retreat NOW, while things are good or at the very earliest signs that maybe they are not as good as you thought. Pray together NOW. Seek out counseling NOW and equip yourself to be a good husband or wife NOW so you can avoid disaster. Lay aside your needs, expectations, and distractions and focus on your spouse's needs and desires without any agenda other than loving them. Are you questioning your spouse's love for you? Start showering them with reasons to love you and watch what happens!
Most importantly, enlist the help of God and the power of the Holy Spirit NOW to help you do what you cannot do on your own, which is to place your spouses needs before your own EVERY DAY with no strings attached, and trust that he or she will do the same for you.
Take action now. Because the last thing you any of us want to add to our list of youthful mistakes is "marriage." And unlike cautionary tales of teenage car trouble, stories of divorce, betrayal, heartache, shame, and broken families aren't nearly as amusing at family gatherings.
